Carrying Her Heart

I am dedicating this site to my beloved daughter Rachel whose earthly life ended on Sept. 17,2009.This is just a glimpse of the path I walk through this journey of grief.

Sunday, January 1, 2012

If I were a butterfly


Well, hello 2012.
I went today, this first day of the year, to Rachel's garden. This year already holds so much possibility for me. I am hoping to be in a place where I can reach out more to others and not be so consumed with my own pain. I have been in a place that I refer to as a cocoon. I have been wrapped up in my thoughts and have been being still and waiting. I am hoping that this year is the time that I get to spread my wings. I went today and set out some new flowers and of course some butterflies. To me, butterflies are such a symbol of transformation. What a massive amount of transition this tiny creature goes through in such a short time. Imagine your whole life changing to the point that you are unrecognizable. That is the part that is so symbolic to me. The butterfly never questions what is changing in her life and in her body. If only we could be more like the butterfly as we go through transitions. Spending our time being angry and worrying is wasted time. The butterfly is an example of keeping the faith no matter how things are changing. We are all on our own journey with endless turns and shifts, and at the end we are changed. We are not at all the same person as when we first stepped out on our path. I know I have stumbled so much, and don't have the gracefulness of a butterfly, but I am thankful for the unmerited grace that I do have through my Jesus.



But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."


“Lord I crawled across the barrenness to you with my empty cup uncertain in asking any small drop of refreshment. If only I had known you better I'd have come running with a bucket.” -Nancy Spiegelberg


I wanna set the world on fire
Until it's burning bright for You
It's everything that I desire
Can I be the one You use?

I, I am small but
You, You are big enough
I, I am weak but
You, You are strong enough to
Take my dreams
Come and give them wings
Lord with You Nothing I can not do
Nothing I cannot do

1 comment:

  1. That is beautiful. I pray this is a blessed new year for you & your whole precious family. Jesus came & died to make us all "NEW" & I will always believe in you my sweet friend...love you like crazy, Chris :D

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