Fly

This week has been a really hard.One of my very dear friends from school passed away on Monday.She had been trying to overcome cancer for the past 7 years. I had known Jodie since Jr High.We were in band together.I got out of band in High school, but we remained friends.She went on vacation with us, we went to the beach together after graduation, and we even shared an apartment.We actually shared a room..You really learn a lot about someone when you live with them.We also were in each others weddings...Jodie was so fun to be around.She was a tall girl.She definitely had a strong presence in a room.She also had a sweetness about her that was very sincere.She really wanted you to be happy.She spent the last years of her life pushing for them to change the age of screening for colon cancer, hoping to help someone else avoid what she had to endure.They say that adversity builds character, but I think it also REVEALS it.Jodie has spent the past 7 years living .Living her life with dignity,grace, and compassion. I regret that I did not go to my 25 year reunion.It was in October,last year..I just couldn't.Jodie came in for it...I wish I could have seen my friend one last time.On my facebook page I posted the words to the Celin Dion song "Fly" just moments after I found out that Jodie had passed..I love the words to the song ..the line that says "take your gentle happiness far to beautiful for this"..it is for my friend Jodie, and for my beautiful Rachel.....

Fly, fly little wing
Fly beyond imagining
The softest cloud, the whitest dove
Upon the wind of heaven's love
Past the planets and the stars
Leave this lonely world of ours
Escape the sorrow and the pain
And fly again

Fly, fly precious one
Your endless journey has begun
Take your gentle happiness
Far too beautiful for this
Cross over to the other shore
There is peace forevermore
But hold this mem'ry bittersweet
Until we meet

Fly, fly do not fear
Don't waste a breath, don't shed a tear
Your heart is pure, your soul is free
Be on your way, don't wait for me
Above the universe you'll climb
On beyond the hands of time
The moon will rise, the sun will set
But I won't forget

Fly, fly little wing
Fly where only angels sing
Fly away, the time is right
Go now, find the light



This is part of Jodies story in her own words..her last days were spent taking experimental drugs to try to get rid of the tumors in her brain....take the time to read it ,and then reflect on the "little things" that have been making your life so hard.....

One thing I have learned as I have grown older is that everyone has a story about something that has impacted their life dramatically. This is mine. Five and a half years ago at the age of 37 I thought I was invincible. I was single, active and had a successful business career. I traveled, was involved in the local social scene, had great friends and a wonderful family connection. I had reached a place where I had learned a great deal about myself and felt a level of self confidence I had never felt before. I was in a great place in my life. Then everything changed in a moments notice. I was on a business trip in Arizona when getting ready for work I noticed I had passed a blood clot while going to the restroom before I headed out for the morning. I was startled because it was large and something I had never noticed before. I decided to go to a local medical clinic in town to discuss with a doctor. Upon our conversation, the doctor stated it could be a number of any issues such as stomach problems, ulcers, polyps, etc. His best advice was to go back home and schedule a colonoscopy. I took his advice, and upon arriving back home made the appointment. With my best friend in tow to drive me home after the procedure, I went to my appointment. I was nervous, due to the fact I had heard it wasn’t a pleasant procedure and really had associated it with a much older age group. The procedure took place, and was not anything I had imagined it to be. I undressed, put on my oh- so- fashionable hospital gown, had an IV inserted in my arm and drifted off to sleep. Simple as that. When I awoke, my friend was by my side in my curtained off room as we waited for the doctor who performed the procedure to arrive with information. She came around the curtain looking very serious and proceeded to show me various photographs of my colon, some revealing polyps she had removed, with one shocking photo in particular. It was a large tumor in my sigmoid colon which was revealed to be colon cancer. I was stunned, and really could not absorb the news. My friend took me home, poured me a glass of wine, and let me cry my heart out. How could this be?? I was only 37 years old, thought I was healthy and felt great. Had it not been for my friend, I don’t know how I would have managed. From that point on it was a dizzying time; having to tell my family, scheduling doctor’s appointments, and finally removing about a foot of my colon in a difficult but reasonably non invasive laser surgery. Thank goodness I had been referred to one of the top surgeons in my area for this type of procedure. Later, I was told that had I waited much longer, the tumor would have passed through the lining of my colon and spread all throughout my abdomen, resulting in a very dismal opportunity of survival. The news following my first of many surgeries was one I had hoped I would not face. I felt hopeful that removing the tumor would be the end of the nightmare. Instead it proved to only be the beginning. My surgeon called me about a week after the surgery and reluctantly told me that the cancer had metastasized and the cells were now in my system; there was no way to tell where they would land and what organs could be affected next. I remember being sick at my stomach as I held the phone in my hand and turned to tell my mother, who was staying with me during my recovery. We just sat down together and cried. The days following were filled with many types of emotions; anger, fear, frustration, pain and despair to name a few. It is now over five years, six major surgeries (to remover tumors that formed in my lungs), seven rounds of chemotherapy and lots of prayers later. I have been told again I have new nodules in my lungs and liver as well as cancerous activity in my bones and just stated radiation on a new found brain tumor. I have been able to fight and keep the cancer at bay, but have yet to beat it into remission as treatment options are becoming increasingly limited. My friends, family and co-workers have rallied around me and supported me every step of the way. I have married a man who loves me cancer and all, vowing to always be by my side no matter what. My oncologist, my doctors and nurses are the best and I feel lucky to have them helping me through my battle. My wish is to share my story, especially to a younger group, to raise awareness to get colonoscopies and cancer screening at a much earlier age so that a similar situation can be prevented. I pray daily that I can beat this and put it behind me; but no matter what I will never lose my appreciation for life and all of the blessings that have been given to me. My only regret is that it took something like this to show me the value of every day, and what truly is important in life. I have learned to not sweat the small stuff, and stay positive even in the face of adversity. Please join me in my mission of awareness. The Face for Colon Cancer is a way for me to reach out and touch the 20-30-40 something age group and motivate them to learn more about colon cancer. It is preventable.