I know why the caged bird sings

This week was a very long,hard week.I didn't anticipate being so low after having such a wonderful Sunday.Grief is very unpredictable.Sometimes I can hear a song, no problem.The same song different day,HUGE reaction.I can feel my emotions begin to change.I can feel them welling up inside of me.I had an awful migraine on Thursday and I think my consuming all the chocolate out of the candy bowl didn't help.But Thursday was one of the hardest days I've had.I woke up in tears.I went to Rachels' garden after I dropped the girls off at school.I cried the whole way there.I miss so many things about her.We spent a lot of time together in the car.Music was always a huge part of our life.We sang together.I was Faith she was Tim.I was Jon Bon Jovi she was my Richie Sambora.Whatever song was on= it was an unspoken between us.It just happened.I feel the need to sing now more than ever.I feel in some way like she expects me too.I was thinking about something I heard Mya Angelou say about the poem"I know why the caged bird sings".She said- it has too..That's how I feel.

"I know why the caged bird sings..

It's not a carol of joy or glee,
but a prayer that it sends from its heart's deep core,
a plea that upward to heaven it flings.
I know why the caged bird sings. "

Thursday about 7pm I went to church to "sing".I left with a headache ,I came home with a smile and a song in my heart.